Beauty Worship

 

September 2022

We don’t notice how much we worship money, wealth and beauty. We adore the beautiful and successful, hanging posters on our walls or purchasing magazines that show us their glorious lives and beautiful faces. We pay actors and athletes amazing salaries for being talented, yes. But there are other talented people in our world who are not as beautiful.

I have my students read a story called “Life in the Iron Mills” by Rebecca Harding Davis. In the story, an iron mill worker makes beautiful art pieces out of the slag. The owner and investors come one day to take a tour. They come upon this man, and are amazed at his art. They talk about how it would stand against other art they have seen and how well it would sell. They talk about the possibility of setting up a studio for the man. This entire conversation is within the worker’s hearing, and then it’s like they awaken to where they are. They see the rough, dirty, tired man and the filth and darkness all around them, and shake off their momentary vision. They leave without another word to the man. For a brief moment he shared their dream as they talked, and then it was over, back to the fires and back breaking work.

Like those investors, we can convince ourselves that art (or beauty in general) can only come from something that already looks pleasing. How much talent lies in either? We don’t expect beauty from less pleasing places or people, and we don’t like lingering and looking, almost fearing their situation will wear off on us. Our city slums and homeless camps? We have no idea if talent is there, but we don’t go looking

Ishiguro’s book Never Let Me Go raises the question ‘what makes a person human?’ What gives a person a soul? One character believes it’s the ability to create art. But when the unexpected create art, the masses are unwilling to see it. To them it is easier and better to believe these are not wholly human. Not unlike how we look at people of color, or people who are different from us – it’s easier to decry their color or differences and believe that makes them lesser humans, if human at all. And that makes it easy to despise and mistreat. So goes the history of mankind – you are not like me, so I will kill you and be free of any who are not like me.

And Christians are as guilty as the next person of this behavior. Skin color has been one area, many slave owners believed their slaves had no souls. There was the belief that the Bible taught this, something to do with God’s curse of Noah’s son Ham. And yet, if you read the account in Genesis, God didn’t curse Ham, Noah did. And Ham became the father of many nations, yes some south to Africa, but also Canaan. God didn’t curse Black people.

When I was a youth director, I had a pastor tell me I was teaching leadership in the wrong way. I encouraged all the kids to try their hand at leading something. The pastor informed me that this wasn’t the way. You take the most popular kids (athletes, cheerleaders, most beautiful) and you put them up front, and all the others will follow. So, if that worked, I’d just be training followers? No, those followers would aspire to be like the upfront kids. So, somehow they would become athletes and cheerleaders? The average kids would become beautiful, just by watching the beautiful leaders? What I actually found was that this pastor didn’t believe the average, plain, not classically popular kids could become leaders; in fact, they shouldn’t. Those kids don’t make Christianity attractive.

I didn’t follow his advice. And I discovered a beauty far beyond what he imagined, as kids found their gifts and used them, becoming leaders in their own way. Some of those kids are now pastors themselves.

With our incessant focus on the beautiful, the superficial, and becoming that ourselves, we miss the point. We miss a lot of people. We fail to follow the pattern Jesus modeled – the first shall be last, and the last first. Whom are we overlooking? Whom are we blind to as we walk through our lives? All wear the image of Christ, as there is nothing more beautiful.

 August 2023

This is the last of my writing from last summer. 

Family

 

September 5, 2022

It is Labor Day Weekend. Summer is winding down, I’m back to work and feeling a bit melancholy. We had a wonderful summer, days with friends and family, playing groupies to my brother’s band, sitting in the sun, reading lots of books, occasionally doing something traditionally productive like gardening or laundry. This weekend I had time with my oldest and closest friend (at another concert) and with my family (playing games and eating barbecue). An almost perfect time.

Of course, it can’t be perfect. We get in the way. Life gets in the way. My friend was recovering from bronchitis and her coughing made others wary of Covid. My family has its own occasional digs and worries that pop up in their heads during gatherings, jealousies, illness, competitiveness. But those things aside, it was lovely to be together, laughing and reminiscing and still choosing to spend time together, despite our baggage.

So many people avoid their family. Even after Covid drove us inside and away from others for months, some still don’t see the point of family. Friends, that’s another story, but family not so much. The idea that my sister and I would see each other every day, take turns cooking meals to share together every evening would blow some minds. We simply enjoy each other’s company best. She’s the easiest person to be with. We even enjoy sitting in silence. It’s a privilege.

The other side of all this is my need for alone time. When everyone left yesterday I was exhausted, and I hadn’t had to do a whole lot. It was the impact of having people around for eight hours of nonstop conversation and fun. While it’s happening, it’s great, but after it’s over I am done.  Sometimes I wish I had my brother’s extravert personality that draws strength from being with others. I enjoy it, most times, but pay on the other side.

I saw that in my students during our on-line school. Some were thriving, being alone most of the day, not having to be around the crowds. But others were fading away, depressed and lonely and certainly not gaining any strength from faces on a computer screen. We need what we need. It wasn’t healthy for any of us. Introverts need people too, though we can convince ourselves otherwise. And it didn’t help any of us to have only ourselves for company.

“It is not good for man to be alone.”  Within the creation accounts in Genesis, God makes this statement. He walked and talked with Adam every day. Adam also had all the animals around him, occupying his time naming them. Some could even talk or at least communicate – the serpent could, and no one seemed surprised at this.  But God observed it was not enough. Adam needed more. So God made him a partner.  Even in a sinless world, with God there to walk with you, and talk with you and answer all your questions, it wasn’t enough.  That has always amazed me. Perhaps it’s just having someone like me, which God certainly is not on most every level.

If we needed companionship from someone like our self in a sinless world, how much more that companionship must have been cherished once the world was broken by sin. To find a husband or a wife or a friend who would listen, and understand and walk with you must have been some of the best life could offer. Especially amidst the violence and evil that also began to surround them.

It makes it all the more sad that some people choose to cut themselves off from others, perhaps because they’ve been hurt or abused. It seems preferable to go it alone. But alone isn’t what’s best for us. I am so thankful for weekends like this, where I have shared time with some of my favorite people. I don’t want to take those times for granted, because I am so lucky to have them at all.

 

July 2023

My family was all together on the Fourth of July this year. There used to be a lot of us – grandparents, aunts and uncles, four kids, spouses. I remember a few Christmas’ with a dozen people around my table. Now there are 7. It was a delight to have our nephew choose to join us. We usually see him only twice a year. But, he chose to spend much of the time alone on his phone. When it was just one or two of us, he’d hang around and talk, but when we were all here – too many. I get it. But at dinner, with all of us present, sitting around my dining table out on the deck, I was in my special place.

 

I am thankful for my family and our connections. I know we have something a lot of people do not. It’s not like we don’t aggravate each other, because we do that probably better than anyone else could. But we also enjoy each other’s company and choose to spend time together. I thank my parents for that, and look forward to someday all sitting around a table together again.

Judging the Book by its Cover

 

August 2022

Years ago, waiting for church to begin, I watched a group of young adults enter and sit down. They were dressed like they’d just left the clubs and came to church. They had a young child with them, dressed in a suit. I thoroughly judged them, not necessarily as unfit for attending church, but ill prepared to do so. Makes me wince to even remember that. The service began, and midway the pastor announced a child dedication. Most often it’s young parents bringing a baby for dedication, but this day it was one of those young people walking up with the little guy in the suit. I remember it very clearly because I was so thoroughly humbled. The pastor said something like, “our prayer is that you will one day come to know Jesus as your Savior, just as your mother has so recently come to know Him.”

Walt Wangerine wrote about a woman, Yolanda, who had an unruly child who had disrupted the service multiple times, asking Pastor Walt if “there is room in this church for me?”  The young woman at my church was probably wondering the same thing. It takes a lot of courage to walk into a church on Sunday. I wonder how many strangers actually do it? I don’t even like to walk into new churches.

I am reading Dane Orland’s Surprised by Jesus. He talks about how Jesus redefines the “in” group. The religious leaders had such issue with all the people Jesus ate and fellowshipped with. They were outsiders, wrong for someone of His stature. The religious leaders would never stoop so low. Simon, the Pharisee, in Luke thoroughly judged the woman who came in and knelt at Jesus’ feet. “If only he knew who she really was,” Simon thought. And unknown to Simon, Jesus not only knew who the woman was, He also really knew who Simon was.

The church has made it so difficult for people to come and feel welcome. Even when externally we offer a handshake and a cup of coffee. Would we invite them home with us? Do they feel they have to hide who they really are in order to be accepted?  If they shared about their divorce, their alcoholism, their homosexuality, their abortion would they still be welcome? On equal footing?

I am glad churches have become less formal, although my mother would struggle with coming into the sanctuary in casual clothes.  I know different clothes cause us to behave in different ways, but I like that today people could walk in and probably see someone wearing what they have on – jeans, t-shirt, normal clothes - rather than suits and dresses. Even pastors have stopped wearing ties. My dad would struggle with that, my grandfather even more, since he wore a tie gardening. J  But what does it matter what we wear if we are still judging people who walk through the door? Or would if we could see inside them?

Ortland reminds us that we are all sinners saved by grace. We need to remember that every day as we encounter others. And those sins are not on a grading scale. Sin is sin, and every one of them nailed Jesus to the cross. My sins are not better than anyone else’s. It doesn’t matter if I have never done X, I’ve done Y and that misses God’s standard just the same. Thank God He doesn’t judge us by what we’ve done or haven’t done. No one would be admitted.

But Jesus paid that price for us, so that sin is no longer the impediment for our being part of God’s kingdom. But sin continues to plague us, and separate us and fill us with condescending judgement. How wrong is that? How backwards? God went to great lengths to forgive us, and we continue to use what has been forgiven to separate us from each other.  Part of that is our refusal to admit sin is still there. Yes, Jesus paid the price, but we will sin. We think we shouldn’t be sinning, and so we have to pretend we are not. We pretend because it is impossible not to sin.

If we could just admit that sin is still in us, and no sin is any worse than another when it comes to separating us from God, maybe we could do a better job of opening our hearts and doors to fellow sinners, rather than judging them unfit for our company.

 

July 2023

Before school ended I learned that one of my fellow teachers was a Christian. I was surprised. And there it is again, that judging a book by its cover rather than seeing people as Jesus sees them. I was both humbled and delighted. I wonder what people think of me when I don’t know anyone is watching? I hope they can still see Jesus.

Who is God?

 

July 2022

If you were to ask me, “who/what is God?” I am not sure what I would/should answer. Very unsatisfactory. The words I know too often meet with ears that cannot understand. Creator of the Universe, Savior of mankind, The Great Designer– which one would you pick? “What about that Old Testament God? The one who keeps ordering everyone’s deaths, the warrior and punisher?” Sovereign Lord with all rights over us, the Grand Potter who can smash his pottery whenever it displeases him. “What type of God allows children to be killed in their school, or cancer, or rape – you pick the badness, why would a loving God allow any of that? What type of God is that?” God of free will, God who allows us to make our own choices?

Most often my opportunity to address those questions comes in my senior English class where we talk about worldviews and begin with Theism, specifically Christian Monotheism and its impact on Western Civilization. Of course, we proceed from there, as many have deemed theism a failure and have searched for meaning via other avenues, most specifically science.  Once Theism is defined and discussed (and usually dismissed by the majority), it continues to haunt the students all year. So we veer back to it and try to answer their questions.

Christianity is so misunderstood, thanks in no small part to Christians. My students see Christianity as a rigid, judgmental religion that demands much and is lived ineptly. Christians really have to be pretty empty minded to follow such rot. And God? Well, if there is a God, why is the world in the mess it is in? Jesus? Good teacher, perhaps. None of the stories, history, are really even known. Easter is totally foreign beyond candy and pastels.

Sometimes I sit there and feel totally overwhelmed by the enormity of their lack. Where to even begin? And, being that I am in school teaching a class, how much dare I? I correct the blatant errors – Christianity is the cause of all the wars in history, wrong. Most recently, America is a Christian country where the majority of people living here are Christian and keep telling those of us who don’t believe how to live our lives. Wrong again. I asked them, knowing the answer, how many of them were Christians, or had been raised in a Christian home, or had multiple friends who were Christians in Christians homes?  Well, they didn’t know any, or many, certainly none of them. So? Had they not heard of the squeaky wheel? The Christians they hear in the political realm are not the majority, just the loudest.

Over time I’ve come to believe that the best answer is me. And I don’t mean that egotistically. Once they know I am a believer in God and Jesus (and sometimes it takes all year to discover that – someone has to ask), then my life, my person, what they know of me comes into view. Do I match their stereotype? I try hard not to. They should know I am not empty headed. I value thinking and observation and ideas. They should also know I try not to be judgmental of them (although that is one of my issues), and love and accept them for who they are. I had a student ask if I was a Christian, followed by did I believe that God destroyed Sodom to kill all the gay people? Loaded question, because this student is gay. But what an opportunity to talk. (God destroyed Sodom because the people of Sodom were full of all manner of evil. Sin. And the Bible teaches that we are all sinners. Sin is missing the mark, and the mark can be represented, in part, by the 10 Commandments. The Commandments are a packaged deal, break one, break them all. So maybe I’ve never murdered anyone, or stolen anything from my neighbor, but certainly I have been jealous and I have a lot of gods in my life. The student then said, “well no one could keep all that”. And I said, ”precisely”. That is the point. We are unable to meet the mark. And that’s where Jesus comes in. And I left it at that).

 Given the opportunity, I challenge those who are seeking to read the Bible for themselves. Start with the New Testament and read the Gospels. Jesus said, “if you’ve seen me, you’ve seen the Father.” Jesus is the perfect visual of Who and What God is. Those who take up the challenge are often surprised by what they find. Jesus is surprising. But wasn’t he just a man?  A man who claimed to be God – I often bring in C S Lewis’ line about “Liar, Lunatic or Lord.” Jesus can’t be a good teacher and crazy, or lying. So they have to reckon with that. Jesus really is the very best answer to whom God is, acceptance, grace, forgiveness, and then there is the sacrifice part.  Our need met by God. Why would God do that? That’s the real question.

 

July 2023

The same student this past year had another profound insight. I had asked, regarding the character Pip in Great Expectations, “What did he really want?” And they came up with the usual, and I pushed them to go deeper. He wanted to be loved, to be accepted for who he is. He wanted to like himself. But he was asking that of the people around him, who so often failed him. I asked the class “what do you really want?” They agreed they wanted the same, basic things. I asked if it was ever possible to fully achieve that? And this student said, “only if there really is a God.”

The Privilege to Bear Arms

 

Written July 2022

Yesterday was the Fourth of July. It was a beautiful day here. We watched a boat parade along the lake – mostly large, electric pontoon boats festooned in bunting and American flags. One had rubber blow up eagles in the front and a blow up Uncle Sam in the back. On the Fourth we are all patriots, or so it seems. The sounds of fireworks going off all day make animals cringe under furniture and made me think of the sounds living in a war torn land – but of course we are not. This is America, land of the free, and we celebrate our freedom by making the sounds of war pretty with sparkling color, once it’s dark. For the rest of the day it’s just the sound of simulated gun fire we seem to enjoy.  And, of course, in the midst of all this, someone took a real gun into a parade and killed several people. Happy Birthday America.

We had a discussion about gun rights, 2^nd Amendment. An acquaintance had posted something on Facebook about their right to carry a hidden weapon into Target. It doesn’t cause the non-carrying people any harm, and if gunmen comes in with evil intent, it’ll save them. And if that non-carrying, anti-gun person says anything to the gun carrier – well, they will be reminded that via the Second Amendment, carrying that gun is their right as an American, and don’t you dare try to take that away from me.

Another person was talking about all the guns they proudly owned, and just let “them” try and come on our property to take them.  Let who? The police. Why would the police be coming on your property? To take my guns. They are going to, you know.  Why would I know that? Because these anti-gun people are going to try to get all our guns removed, but we are prepared, we won’t let them. It’s our Second Amendment right.

“The right to bear arms”. Some people chose to respect that right, and others love to flaunt it and a few abuse it. But regardless, every single day you read of someone using their “right” to kill fellow Americans. Angry, frustrated, probably in many cases, mentally ill people abusing their “right” and taking the lives of others. Why can’t we see that to the rest of the free world this is a crazy, American puzzle? Why do we so willingly arm our people to kill our people? Why can an 18 year old buy a semi-automatic weapon, walk into an elementary school and kill second graders? Only in America.

I think we have lost sight of what any of our Bill of Rights really mean. We have confused privileges, opportunities, with some type of biblical right to do whatever we want.  All of the freedoms stated in those first 10 Amendments have limitations, or did have. We limit freedom of speech – some hate speech is even prohibited, but certainly we can’t yell “fire” in a crowded space – or other harmful utterances. I doubt very much our founding fathers meant for us to have unlimited gun rights, particularly if we arrived at a place where we had better civil protection (police), and certainly they never imagined the evolution of the gun. I also don’t think they would be impressed with those standing on their “right” as a reason not to limit what guns can be placed in the hands of troubled 18 year olds – or 50 year olds.

I think of the young man who brought a gun to a protest last year. Why bring a gun? Well, it’s his right. OK, so he brings the gun to the protest because it’s his right to carry it – but that assumes he thought there would be trouble a gun could help him handle. And, it did. Someone is dead and the young man was found innocent at his trial because he believed he was “protecting himself”. Certainly he was met by a riled up crowd. But they didn’t have guns, he did. And he used lethal force to meet their hands and fists and sticks. It’s his “right” isn’t it?  But if he had not brought a gun across state lines to that protest. If he’d decided that there are better ways to show your disagreement of what they were protesting, there would have been no death.

“Guns don’t kill people, people kill people.” Well, yes. You don’t see deer packing heat to protect themselves. But it’ people carrying guns who kill people. Take the gun away and there will be a lot fewer people killed. Certainly people die of knife wounds, and fists, and feet and whatever else has been imagined, but if you walk into an elementary school with a knife and hands and feet you won’t kill a roomful of children before you are brought down. A lot less people would die.

But, no, our “right to bear arms” trumps those children, and all the other people killed by gun violence through the years. Mrs. Winchester was haunted by the ghosts of all the people her family’s guns had killed. She tried to make amends by giving the ghosts a place to live, or find them rest. And maybe she was a little wacky. The main point is she was haunted by the power of the weapon her husband’s family had created and spent her fortune trying to distance herself. What are we doing?  A lot of rhetoric, but children and parade goers are still dying. What an American legacy.

 

July 2023

For the few months of this year we had more shootings than we had days (CNN recently reported 400 by mid-July). Obviously, since I wrote this, things are not getting better. In countries with stricter gun laws, where gun ownership is seen as a privilege, not a right, there are considerably fewer mass deaths. And after each incident here there is talk of doing something – but very little action. I wonder what Jesus would say about all this?

The Loss of Roe V Wade

 

Written June 2022

Roe versus Wade was just shot down by the Supreme Court, a court President Trump was able to stock with conservative judges, with more appointees than most presidents ever see. The outspoken Christian right voted for Trump with this goal in view. And they are celebrating their calculated victory. They won, abortion is no longer the law of the land, left in the hands of individual states, many of whom had bills on hand to totally abolish the act of abortion in their state.  How can this not be God’s will? Look how it all fell into place.

Certainly, I find abortion repugnant. I cannot think of a reason why I would have chosen to have one, especially with adoption so much a part of my family. But as certain as I am that I would not have chosen abortion for myself, I cannot understand why I should stop someone else from having one. What purpose would I have> Saving the unborn? But saving them for what, a life of being unwanted, a life of poverty?  And what business is it of mine if my neighbor decides to cheat on a test, steal paper from work, punch out an adversary or have an abortion. I am not their keeper.

Do the anti-abortionists believe that they are somehow adding points towards their salvation? Do they think that they are making the world a better place for God? Ushering the return of Christ? Do they imagine that young women will turn in droves towards the church as a result of this loving act?  I had a phone call years ago from an anti-abortionist group asking me what I felt for the millions of babies being killed. I said I believed God had those babies in heaven, and I was concerned about the millions of women who felt compelled to that extremity. Who is concerned about them? What provisions have been made by these celebrating groups, for the women who can no longer get an abortion, who might even be tried for murder?

Legislating morality hasn’t ever really worked. People still murder and burglarize and defraud. And even harsh penalties (three strikes, death penalty) haven’t kept people from continuing to break those laws. How do we suppose making abortion illegal will actually stop abortions? We are all sinners. Our best accomplishment is sin. Our entire character leans toward sin. Tell us to not do something and we reach toward it. Sure, we can withstand some temptations, but we all have our weakness. We all still bend toward sin, even if it’s just thoroughly judging others, or putting up obstacles that keep them from meeting the Lord.

My students believe that America is still a theistic country, even though none of them are theistic, nor their parents or very few people they know. They believe this because of the power the Christian Right seems to wield. They have had front row seats watching the Roe Versus Wade decommissioning. And they ask, what next? LGBQ+ rights? Birth control?  They see Christians as being intolerant of their rights, of enforcing “Christian” rules on non-believers. Where is the equity in that? And when in history did it ever even work, to mandate everyone behave as Christian, if not agree to become one?  America was born out of people seeking to have freedom from a state church, to worship, or not, as they deemed fit, not as the state imposed it.  And yet, here we are today, having the religious right impose their beliefs on everyone else.

Jesus seemed unconcerned about the Roman rule or laws in His day. He was more concerned with legalistic Jews keeping people from knowing God, setting up false barriers and multitudes of laws that made it seem impossible to please God. Jesus blew holes in all those laws. Not that God’s laws were bad, just impossible to live, and when humans piled on with even more laws – no one had a chance. So Jesus wasn’t a zealot trying to throw off Roman rule. He didn’t make a cause against treatment of women or slavery or any ill of His day. Instead, he walked and talked and ate with those people who had been persecuted against. He made them feel loved and accepted by Him, even if the world had pushed them away. Jesus focused on the heart, and heart relationships. He knew how full of sin we are. He knew that no number of laws would remove our sinfulness, even good laws. Instead, He did the one thing that could be done for us. He took on Himself the sins of us all – every one of us who has ever lived, every sin ever sinned – or was being sinned – or had yet to happen. Jesus died for sin, once for all. And the sin question was removed from the table. Now all God seeks to know is “what have you done about my Son, Jesus?”  He doesn’t ask if we’ve had an abortion or are gay or an alcoholic or a judgmental, Christian right wing Trumper. All He asks is if we’ve accepted the sacrifice of His Son in our place. Period.

And even those who have trusted their life to Christ continue to sin. I still thoroughly judge the right wing. I still struggle forgiving those who set this whole Roe Versus Wade reversal into action. But my forgiveness by God isn’t contingent on my sinlessness – because I can’t be sinless. I am to trust more and more on God, and allow him to do His work in my, in spite of my still raging sin nature. And regularly confess my sins so He can be free to use me.  But the saving is over, occurring on that Cross 2000 years ago and made real in my life when I accepted the gift when I was a teenager.  So I can accept that many of the anti-abortionists trying to push their lifestyle on to un-believers is done so in good, but ignorant, belief that they are somehow helping to usher in God’s Kingdom.

Problem is, we don’t usher in anything of God’s. And even if the new law stopped all abortions going forward, it still wouldn’t stop sin. And it still wouldn’t bring people to God. My young girls think that Christians hate them for their lifestyle choices, and if the Christians hate them, why would God love them?  They believe that they have to totally change who they are, scrub themselves clean from things others call “sin” and they just see as part of their personality, before they would be acceptable to God, and why would they? Why would they wish to be part of a God who doesn’t accept them as they are?

And yet, God is a God of choice. He is also a God of mercy and grace and lovingkindness and forgiveness. He does accept them right where they are, based on the work of His Son on the cross. How sad that message is blurred by well-meaning but legalistic and wrong-focused Christians.

 

July 2023

Again, a year later and many states have enforced extreme anti-abortion laws. What they didn’t foresee is that many of the procedures used in an abortion are also used to help women in the aftermath of a miscarriage or other uterine related issues. There are doctors afraid to perform the routine D & C procedure for fear of legal repercussions due to their state’s new laws. This puts women’s lives at risk, women who were not seeking an abortion, just seeking good medical care. The ripple effect has been huge. The best conservatives can hope for is that they won’t be needing one of these, often, life saving procedures anytime soon.

Obstacles to Grace

 

First written 6/2022

This is gay pride month. Most Christians (at least of the more conservative bent) would view this as an abomination. I teach in a school where there are several students dealing with gender issues – gay, trans, non-binary, bisexual, to name a few. They are trying to figure out who they are, like all their peers – who they are, whom they are attracted to, how they express themselves. And sometimes they evolve in and out of these new ideas. Sometimes they become exactly who they are.  They teach me a lot. Their road isn’t an easy one. There is so much confusion and fear and hatred of the LGBTQ+ community. No one would choose to put themselves through that. These kids are not opting to be gay or bi or trans. They are discovering who they truly are, and learning how to live with that – like we all do.

But as a Christian, don’t I believe that homosexuality is a sin? What isn’t a sin? We are all sinners. There isn’t the smallest section of our being that isn’t permeated with sin. We don’t have to be gay to be full up with sin. We forget that. God doesn’t look down and see a couple big sins. He sees all sin.  All have sinned and fall short of God’s standard. So when we zero in on specific sins, we are only fooling ourselves.

The Bible neatly arranges verses on sin to include sexual sins alongside anger and jealousy and judgement.  And they are all weighted the same. Someone I know was recently tapped to lead a Bible study group. She was given additional information on how to “deal with” any homosexuals or divorced people who joined her group.  She was instructed to be accepting of all, but when the Bible speaks to these two issues, she wasn’t to skirt them. They are sin.  So I asked her if she had pages on how to “deal with” angry people, judgmental people, people who abuse and try to control other people, people who are without grace and kindness, were there informational sheets on them?  Of course not, but there should be.

We forget that in God’s sight, sin is sin.  There are no big or little sins. Homosexuality isn’t any worse than alcoholism or intolerance. We are so used to being sinners, we can’t even see the sin that besets us.  We become self-righteous and, in order to maintain that, we must point to the “worse” sins of others. But the Bible doesn’t make those distinctions.  Why do we?

The Bible teaches that Jesus died for all sin, for all time.  In other words, all my sins were forgiven 2000 years ago on a cross outside of Jerusalem. All of my sin.  All of your sin. All of the sins of those marching in the gay pride parades across the country.  All sin.  No exceptions.  And, as a result, the issue isn’t what to do about sin, especially the sins of others.  The issue is what to do about Jesus’ gift of forgiveness.  He went to extraordinary lengths to purchase our freedom from sin and its penalty – death. Why do we throw it back at him and focus on particular sins, as if it were our job to erase them?  We certainly don’t look at other’s sins with a view to forgive. It’s always with a view to condemn, and, if possible, make their lives more difficult.  We take it upon ourselves to be the judge, jury and executioner.  We neglect Jesus’ extravagant gift of forgiveness, acting as if there were certain things he didn’t die for – because those things make us uncomfortable.

We are talking about people, people needing to know Jesus and experience His remarkable forgiveness When Jesus’ was on earth, he walked with “these people
and ate with them and deeply loved them.  The same people we’d like to erase, to demean and create laws that make them second class citizens.  I have a lesbian friend who told me one time she might be able to believe in God. God made some sense to her. But she didn’t think she could ever believe in Jesus, because Jesus hated her.  What?!! Well, the people who love Jesus hate her, so why wouldn’t she make the next leap to believe they were following Jesus and he hated her too?

Do you hear that?  Our self-righteous attitude in singling out homosexuality has driven people away from Christ.  I wonder what Christ thinks of that?  I wonder what He thinks about our trying to force gay children through rehabilitation camps to change their thinking. I wonder what he thinks about our trying to block gay marriages and gay adoptions from people who just want to be in companionship with someone and raise a family, like everyone else. Jesus died for all these people. He has already forgiven all their sins. And yet we make their sins front and center and say, in effect, that they are not fit for the Kingdom. Like we are?

He who has been forgiven much loves more.  Look at Jesus and Simon the Pharisee. Simon judged the woman who threw herself at Jesus feet. He was disgusted at Jesus’ response to this woman. Why? Because he couldn’t see himself as needing forgiveness. He saw her as the sinner and himself as the saint, and as a result could not love the Savior. 

As long as I think someone else a worse sinner than I, that I have somehow arrived on the sinless list – then I am unable to love Jesus to the fullest and celebrate my salvation.  Because the fact is, we have all been forgiven the same amount – all our sins. And that is as true of those who have yet to believe as it is of us who believe.

I want to learn to love and forgive as Jesus did. I want to err in the direction of loving and accepting everyone God brings into my life. They are all totally, wholly forgiven, whether they know it or not. I need to treat them as Jesus would.

 

 “The strange paradox present on every page of the Gospels and which we can verify any day, is that it is not guilt which is the obstacle to grace, as moralism supposes. On the contrary, it is the repression of guilt, self-justification, genuine self-righteousness and smugness which is the obstacle”….”Before Jesus there are not two opposed human categories, the guilty and the righteous; there are only the guilty.” Jesus exposes the guilt of “the moral and scrupulous people by proclaiming that all men are equally sinful despite all their efforts, so that not by showing off their vaunted impeccability, but by confessing their guilt, by repentance, will they find the grace which erases it.”

 

Paul Tournier, Guilt and Grace, A Psychological Study. New York: Harper and Row, 1962) pp. 136,, 112. As quoted by Dane Orland in Surprised by Jesus, chapter 1 p. 23, 24.

 

 

July 2023

In the year that has passed since I wrote this, many states have passed legislation that blocks the rights of the LGBTQ+ community. In one year the anti LGBTQ sentiments have increased rather than diminished. And Christians around the country are celebrating these new laws, proclaiming them victories for Christianity. As a Christian I continue to have difficulty understanding that. I think of my students and my LGBTQ friends and my heart breaks. This is not how we will draw people to Christ. But it is how we can hurt a lot of people. It also compels me to pray for those who cannot see their own guilt, and beware of my own blind spots, due to sin in my life.

 

 

 

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July 2023

I have taken quite some time off blogging. My apologies. I’m not sure why. I wrote the following pieces over last summer, but never posted them. I can’t even remember, without looking, when I last posted. Hard to believe it’s been since December 2017. My sister passed away and then Covid really kicked us all. Teaching school from home for a year and a half, and then under Covid restrictions the next year (masked and spread apart) played into that. I was exhausted all the time. Then there was the 2020 Presidential campaign, which had, in my opinion, a positive ending, but it was touch and go for a while, and that was exhausting. I feel like I am just now coming out the fog.  I had a great school year. I am planning this coming year to be my last year of teaching. I am excited and scared for what comes after that. I feel more present, so it’s time to begin writing again.

Thank you, to whoever is reading these. I’d love any feedback you’d like to give. Dialogue is more fun than monologue – although I do ok with that J.  I will try to keep up my end of the bargain.